I am feeling quite sick, but I still am not asleep, what's your problem girl! I'm having a major pity party cause my children are gone now, well, not Joseph and Mary. hey! where's Baby Jesus? :) Today was a great day, at one point a guy told a story about being in Guatamala and getting a picture of a guy standing on a pyramid because he wanted to remember the cool accoustical phenomenon he said that it was relevant to our lesson because it was on how a large congregation of people were gathered to hear one man speak, and how it is said that King Benjamin stood on a platform to adress them (this was before microphones). In Relief Society, I was really impressed by several thoughts converging on me almost too difficult to sort them all out, but the jist was that Our ancestors need us to help them, and I don't have an excuse to not be so inclined and active, as long as I breathe I must help, it is a sure thing and I also believe that they, in turn care about me, and will do whatever they can to aid me. I believe, I will be reunited with them again. They are what matters. I had been musing on a point of timing, I even worked out a lecture on this topic, in my head. Howard W. Hunter explained that getting married in the temple was the right way t was to be done, he firmly answered my lingering question, leaving no rom for question. We know the soul is eternal, and we will live forever, so knowing that ought to effect how we choose between things of assumed value. My little family here feels different because it *is* different. it is not eternally sealed. One lady told of her profound experience of being with her close family andher husbands family in the temple and how she felt a connection, as one was forged. I thought on exactly a feeling I had several times, how no matter what I do or pray, I feel no connection or desire to be with Nick's family. I really ought to be a part of it, I think, but I just do not feel or desire it. I think it is because I am not anything more than legally contracted to him, until I die. Before I was sealed to Brandall,I had done a lot of genealogical work for his ancestors, I felt so close to him, those children are mine nd his and I felt like a family. I feel the biggest difference in the world! Such a feeling can be explained easily by the teachings of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I believe that I am here because for some reason that is where my ancestors want me. It is so strong, I almost cannot explain it. There is more that I will not write but let it suffice to say that I think that something marvelous is about to happen in my life and I want to be ready. Um, today it was hot, and sunny. We walked to church and Brooksie taught Mary Anne to use the steps!